In a world full of conspiracy theories, one thing is for certain. The government is always watching you. I am here to tell you that they are watching you in ways you would never think possible. Do I have any evidence to back up this claim? None at all, but does anyone ever have evidence to back up their claims these days? Albeit this is mainly a joke, a wise man once said that all good jokes contain true shit. They are watching us in the form of Egrets, yes you read that correctly, Egrets.

How Could This Be?

Let me ask you this, have you ever seen an Egret do animal shit? No, they just stand there staring. If you do a little research then you will find that Humans used to hunt Egrets extensively, hmm I wonder why. Yet many government funded organizations have worked to “educate” the public about these “birds” and their importance to the ecosystem. Which brings me back to my original question, have you ever seen an Egret do animal shit?

So What Do We Do?

There’s not much we can do at this point. I’m not saying that every Egret is a government manufactured robot, that would be crazy. No, I’m saying that SOME of the Egrets are government manufactured robots. I know a guy that killed an Egret and he said there was no blood. Clearly Edward Snowden forgot to include the section about the Egrets. If you happen to never hear from me again, you now know why. Just today I saw an Egret standing on top of my trashcan staring at me, they know. Is this crazy (and a joke) sure, but can you honestly say it 100% incorrect? One thing is for sure, the government is always watching you.